so what

so a friend of mine just made a blog.. and has renewed my interest in blogging. i think it might be better than facebook in a way. i really wish i had kept up with this over the course of the year - my first year in grad school pretty much done with! whoop! the picture is of me at ring dance last weekend.

sometimes it is still very apparent that i have trouble stepping out of my past and how that has affected me. i lost erik's wallet yesterday and found it just an hour ago. i don't know how big of a deal it was to him - he probably doesn't care that much now that i found it. but i got so distraught from losing it and knowing that it was my fault it was lost. i can't help it. i have trained myself to feel completely horrible for things like that. how do i get rid of it? how do i learn the correct balance of letting the other person know that you're sorry and not stepping over that edge? damnit it is so frustrating the way this fucking person is still affecting me.

never make someone a priority in your life if you are only an option in there's.

sooo.. i just talked to my mom about the boyfriend she's had since about september. apparently it's pretty serious. and weird. especially for me and my brother.

post secret

still working on this one.

it's amazing how someone's face who was once so familiar is now not quite at all...

time.

ariana

i have to say i am currently in love.

wednesday mornings i go to carver elementary school and read to this four-year-old, Ariana. for my first visit, which was last week, i took her a card that said how excited i was to read to her and hopefully become friends. i didn't really think she got the whole concept of getting a card and what it meant which is kind of why i did it in the first place - i wanted to expose her to things older people do. anyways, so i went back this wednesday for my second time and read to her. when i left she was running out the door to go play outside and i told her i would see her next week. before she made it out the door she turned around and said, "i put the card in my room!" i didn't even register what she meant by that until i had turned around and started walking out of the school. she like my card and kept it! i am so excited about spending time with this little girl...

i completely forgot to give the results of my first real jog on pavement.
i lasted about ten minutes before i had to stop. pavement is way harder to run on than the eliptical. i think it is also because the eliptical helps you out a little bit and retains momentum better. anyway, i am very sore.. in places that had never been sore before when running. it's a great feeling and i'm excited and hopeful that i'll continue enjoying running outdoors.

thefacebook

Group Info
Name:
Sabes Que Eres Latino Cuando...
Type:
n/a
Description:
1. If you have ever been hit by a chancleta.
2. If you grew up scared by something called "El Coco or El Cuco."
3. If others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just.....talking.
4. If you light a candle to virgin Mary before the Lotto drawing.
5. If you use your lips to point something out.
6. If you constantly refer to cereal as "conn fleys".
7. If your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you for dinner, even......if it's a one bed room apartment.
8. If you can dance merengue, cumbia or salsa without music.
9. If you use "manteca" instead of olive oil and can't figure out why your butt is getting bigger.
10. If you call your sneakers "tenis"
11. If you have at least, thirty cousins, not counting loco Pepe working at "Don Memo".
12. If you can't imagine anyone not liking Spicy food.
13. If you are in a 5-passenger car with 7 people in it and a person shouting: "muevanse, todavia caben mas".
14. If whenever you feel under the weather, you compulsively dab on some "VIck Vaporub" all over your chest and inside your nostrils.
15. Your mom packs your "lonchera" everyday. You've just turned thirty-two.
16.If you call the North Americans "gringos", including Canadians, and all Asian people (Korean, Chinese, Japanese, Thai's, etc.) "chinos".
17. If you just don't get tired of the so called "sopitas"(soup).
18. If you don't think Jennifer Lopez is hot, 'she is just another bitch with luck".

so, after weeks of training i have decided to document my move from the elipitcal machine to real pavement. i can stand about 20 minutes at a moderate pace on the machine; we shall see how long i last on the ground. wish me luck.